[ Declare your emotional independence ]

Archives.

Categories.

I know I will keep using this method probably for a long time to come, if not forever! I am indebted to Bruce as well as you Deborah, for continuing t…

[ Jan F ] >

Archive for: The Option Method

+ What are we teaching our children about work?

[ Posted on 10.13.2017 ]

What are you broadcasting to your kids about work? Perhaps you love your job and regularly share accomplishments around the dinner table. Your kids are used to seeing you energetically tackle the workweek, coming home with plenty of energy for family time. Or, work is a black hole that you disappear into each Monday, stumbling home on Friday exhausted and disgruntled. Whether you love your job or hate it (and everything in between), what do you want to teach your children about work with your attitude and behavior? And if you have an unhappy relationship with work, can you really isolate that from your family? How much energy do you have for them when you are shut down over something that went wrong on the job? What are you teaching them about how you feel about them? Maybe you don’t have the perfect job. Maybe your boss can be a…

Read more

+ And Now A Word About Mindlessness

[ Posted on 09.10.2017 ]

  I’m about to admit something that could be potentially embarrassing but I do it gladly for all those who have had similar experiences. And, by the way, I’m not embarrassed – just bemused about the sometimes depth of my mindlessness. Last week I believed I locked myself out of my car, only to realize after AAA showed up and opened the door, that the key was not in fact in the car as I believed. To get to this point, I had to forget a whole raft of things related to the key. That I had put in it my purse. That I took my purse with me when we went to get ice cream. That I put the purse down on the floor while I ate the ice cream (so good!) and by the way, NEVER put your purse on the floor. That I walked away from the…

Read more

+ How can we live in the present?

[ Posted on 09.10.2017 ]

One of the greatest yoga teachers of our time, B.K.S. Iyengar*, tells us: “Poets and wise men since the beginning of the written word have enjoined us in all culture to live in the present moment because it is all we really have.  Have you ever wondered, while watching nature films on television in which herds of beautiful gazelles are constantly surrounded by marauding predators, why their life is not a living hell of fear and insecurity? How can they live their family lives of courtship, procreation, joy in their own physical perfection, knowing that the inevitable end will be in the lion’s maw? You cannot say it is dull fatalism, or lack of imagination. If they lacked imagination why would they run away so fast? The answer must be that they have the capacity to live in the present moment as it is and not as it might be.…

Read more

+ You and me and the Game of Thrones

[ Posted on 08.13.2017 ]

Families are notorious for typecasting. Sara is the negotiator but Robert knows has to get things done. Mary could sit and draw all day but Bill is a born salesman. Jack is great at sports but Sasha has a flare for writing. Part of growing up is finding out what we are good at and maybe not so good at. Certainly if no one tells us, we figure it out for ourselves as we try to figure ourselves out. Then we grow up and guess what? That typecasting tends to stick. We think of our family members as we have always thought of them and we think of ourselves the way we always have. Of course, we do grow and change. I used to think of myself as a physically weak because I was sick a lot as a child. That myth got blasted when I backpacked in Europe in…

Read more

+ Is my emotional response to pain controllable?

[ Posted on 06.12.2017 ]

June is National Migraine and Headache Awareness Month!  According to Migraine.com, there are about 100 million people with headaches in the U.S.; about 37 million of these people have migraines. The World Health Organization suggests that 18 percent of women and 7 percent of men in the U.S. suffer from migraines.  After back pain, which accounts for 27% of pain; headache pain accounts for 15%. Apparently we are a nation in pain. According to paindoctor.com, “pain affects more people in the US than diabetes heart disease and cancer combined. A whopping 126 million or 55% of all adults experienced pain in the past three months. And that’s just the pain that’s reported. I remember having migraines when I was in my late teens. There was little else I could do than lie in bed until it passed. Lucky for me, it was episodic and I never had to deal with them…

Read more

Unhappiness is the belief in the wrongness of being.

[ Bruce Di Marsico ]