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I had so much energy after our talk that I went out for a long walk, processing so much. It felt like such an answer for me that I have been searching…

[ Judy W ] >

Archive for: shame

+ The best way to be happy now

[ Posted on 11.21.2018 ]

The Option Method is a fantastic way to change direction when you aren’t feeling the way you want to feel. As quick and effective as it can be, there is even a quicker way to turn yourself around. The first is be happy. Remind yourself that regardless of what you are feeling, your ultimate goal is really to be happy, so why not go there? Ask yourself what you are doing to stand in the way of your happiness? Would it be okay, just for now, to step aside and let it happen? Whatever you think it might cost you, ask yourself if that is really true and see what happens. Second, look at how you are feeling about what you are feeling. Yes, I said, how you are feeling about what you are feeling. Most feelings will pass quickly if we don’t hold onto them. Ever stub your toe?…

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+ Can The Option Method help with guilt and shame?

[ Posted on 02.16.2018 ]

Our focus this month has been on guilt and shame, two sides of the coin of self judgment.  Do you know the difference?  Check out Google “What is the difference between Guilt and Shame?”  and you will find more than 10 million entries. Brene Brown has a simple way to define it: “the difference between shame and guilt is the difference between ‘I am bad’ and ‘I did something bad’.” I’d go further and say both guilt and shame stem from the belief that I am bad.  Saying I did something bad – in the sense that we feel guilty (or bad) about it, is the same as saying I am bad. Otherwise we would never feel bad about it. We would simply observe – Oh I did something that caused xyz to happen. Think about something you feel guilty about and ask yourself this question: If I didn’t feel…

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True Happiness is not the happiness that is sought but the Happiness that already exists.

[ Bruce Di Marsico ]