[ Declare your emotional independence ]



I was immediately stunned by the technique. It seems to not only meet all my ideal criteria simple, fast, elegant, respectful, easy, fun, and powe…

[ Vincent O ] >

Archive for: self-image

+ You and me and the Game of Thrones

[ Posted on 08.13.2017 ]

Families are notorious for typecasting. Sara is the negotiator but Robert knows has to get things done. Mary could sit and draw all day but Bill is a born salesman. Jack is great at sports but Sasha has a flare for writing. Part of growing up is finding out what we are good at and maybe not so good at. Certainly if no one tells us, we figure it out for ourselves as we try to figure ourselves out. Then we grow up and guess what? That typecasting tends to stick. We think of our family members as we have always thought of them and we think of ourselves the way we always have. Of course, we do grow and change. I used to think of myself as a physically weak because I was sick a lot as a child. That myth got blasted when I backpacked in Europe in…

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+ DNA. Who am I and who do I want to be?

[ Posted on 04.25.2017 ]

Last Christmas a package arrived from 23andMe, a DNA testing company – a gift from my sister Pam. Wasn’t it going to be fun? Now the three oldest sisters (out of 9 children with varying combinations of parents) will finally find out what our true heritage is.  What secrets does our DNA hold? And guess what? A few months later we were all officially designated as Ashkenazi Jews – for me, 96.2%.  I have to admit I was a little disappointed. I always knew I was Jewish but I had really hoped there was something a little more exotic and interesting. (What? Ashkenazi isn’t exotic enough for you?!!) Maybe the other 3.8% would spice up the mix. And there it was, somewhere in the mists of time an ancestor was 100% Finnish and even better, 100% Eastern African. Now you’re talking! Some great great great great+  perhaps Ethiopian, Egyptian or Madagascan grandparent in the 1680s…

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+ Who’s in charge? Me or my mind!!

[ Posted on 01.17.2017 ]

If only we could control our minds. Wouldn’t we be invincible then? Nothing could get under our skin. No one could intimidate us. We wouldn’t be afraid of anything. Our emotions would never get away from us. We could bring all our brainpower to whatever we are doing. Maybe we’d even be able to heal ourselves and overcome pain and suffering at will. Wouldn’t we be happy then! Perhaps the idea of controlling our minds is like trying to control an “unruly” puppy.  It’s the puppy’s nature to want to play. Any responsible dog owner wouldn’t expect a puppy to sit still all day long. Why even have a puppy? Perhaps the very thing we want to control in our minds is exactly the thing that makes our minds so wonderful. Our minds wants to play, skip from one thought to the next, resurrect memories at will, free associate, make…

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+ How can I change?

[ Posted on 10.26.2015 ]

Try Being There’s nothing to do to change to be who you already are. It’s an illusion that there’s work to be done as if one of these days you’ll get it right. Who is the you who is getting it wrong? Who is the you who gets it right? Who is you that observes it all and decides What next? It’s just something to do until Eternity arrives. What if it’s already here and we’re missing it? Namaste,  Wendy Dolber photo by Photobonanza

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+ Who is choosing what I do?

[ Posted on 08.25.2015 ]

If you ever feel that you are not doing what you want to do, ask yourself, “Who is choosing what I do?” If you ever have the feeling that you are doing what you don’t want to do, ask yourself, “Who is choosing what I do?” Even if you are doing what you do because others expect, want or even demand that you do it, aren’t you ultimately the chooser?  Even if you are doing what you do because it is the least objectionable choice, aren’t you ultimately the chooser?   If not you, then who? Once we say we are not the chooser, we can become disconnected from our own desires.  We can end up feeling that we ought to, should, and must do things.  How much fun is that? It makes a big difference to our happiness to know that we have the freedom to do what we want.…

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No thing in the world gives happiness. No thing or lack of any thing causes unhappiness. Happiness i…

No thing in the world gives happiness. No thing or lack of any thing causes unhappiness. Happiness is.

[ Bruce Di Marsico ]