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I recently completed what I thought was going to be another fabulous dialogue. I was right. It was much more though. Have you ever been with someone t…

[ Bob F? ] >

Archive for: grief

+ Your mother is calling. Are you listening?

[ Posted on 08.07.2017 ]

  I’m not someone who looks for signs from those who have passed on. But I do like to keep my antennae up just in case. My mother has been dead for over 15 years now and although I have experienced more openness to her, more understanding, more love, it tends to be a one way street. But after reading Marion Goldstein’s wonderful book, Embracing the Sign, A Journey of Faith, Science and Experience, I realized that there have been times when I’ve experienced uncanny occurrences that seemed like a tap on my shoulder from another plane of existence. For example, during a particularly contentious time with my sister, I just happened to find a letter my Mother wrote me many years prior. I was going through a stack of miscellaneous papers, which always seem to populate my desk, and it just emerged. In the letter, she thanked me for being…

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+ Can we talk to the dead?

[ Posted on 05.22.2017 ]

On a windy hill in Japan where the 100 year-old city of Otsuchi used to be, there stands an old fashioned English styled phone booth. Inside is a black rotary phone on a wooden shelf. It is connected to nothing. Or is it? People come from miles away – thousands of them – to talk to their loved ones lost in the tsunami of 2011. They weep. They give the update of their lives. They apologize for lost opportunities. They send hopes that the loved one is eating, staying warm, finding their way home. Does it help? For some families, it is the first time they talked about the loved one as a family – the first time a child has even spoken at all. For Itaru Sasaki, who erected the phone booth after the death of his beloved cousin even before the tsunami wiped away 19250 people – “Because my…

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+ Holidays bringing up painful memories? Here’s what to do.

[ Posted on 12.06.2016 ]

I love the holidays, especially Christmastime.  Whether I am alone or with family, I love the hustle and bustle of the season. The singing. The gift giving. The love. I’m not so crazy about the unrelenting merchandising that pops out earlier and earlier each year but I’ve gotten very good at tuning it out. I know that isn’t true for many others. I often hear people say, “I hate Christmas.” Or “This is the worst time of the year for me.” The reason is often because they are remembering some event that happened during the holidays. That was the time my husband died. Or a fire destroyed our home. Or I lost a child. If you have someone like this in your life, what can you do to help them through this time of year (or any time of year)? What can you do to help yourself? One. Deal with…

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Compassion is the bottom line in The Option Method. That’s the absolute requirement and if you…

Compassion is the bottom line in The Option Method. That’s the absolute requirement and if you ever want to learn to do it for yourself, you’ve got to be at least as nice to you as you would be to others. You’ve got to know when you’re ready to deal with something and when you’re not. And you’ve got to know when you don’t want to question your unhappiness and when you’d be glad to. When you get unhappy enough you’ll be glad to.

[ Bruce Di Marsico ]